This was a story that people participated in game on 9/9/2018 at about 6:00. Here's the transcript:

Unpoke slowly unraveled his peepee from his trousers. He asked the love of his life,
lyrus pet, "Are you ready?"
lyrus pet replied "Aye aye captain"
unpoke decided to unwrap his burger
he took a bite out of it
"Thats a good burger, but back to us..."
Unpoke proceeded to shove his dick up his own ass
Unpoke writhed under the pressure of his own penis,
eating the rest of his burger while doing so.
After finishing his burger, he proceeded to murder terran with
his staff of osiris, with a dildo duct taped to the top.
Brass came and said "I'm gonna release fishing if you don't cut that out!"
Unpoke then dropped a blackdeath and brass became so angry he deleted frg, but
not before Unpoke molested kcat and sucked his own dick

Age: 27

Steam Name(Current): Lieutenant Crombley

Time played on servers?(!time username to check): 88 hours

Where did you hear about this server?: Randomly found it on the server list

Have you ever been banned and why?: Nope. I follow the rules :-)

Why do you want to join?: I have a lot of fun playing with you guys. I've tried other servers but this one is the best.

Referred by: n/a

Additional Details:
I've had a lot of fun playing on this server. I always follow the rules and try to be friendly. I randomly joined this server a couple years ago and play on and off as my schedule allows.

I miss the old yellow background. It stood out great and it matched well with the items associated with it. When it was changed to a weird rainbow background, I tolerated it but nowadays where everything glows and changes color, it lost it's sense of uniqueness. Just a simple change, and maybe have an option to enable / disable to rainbow if people still want it

Age: 18

Steam Name(Current): Shoomez

Time played on servers?(!time username to check): 101.98 Hours

Where did you hear about this server?: NTG, (Private Beta)

Have you ever been banned and why?: No

Why do you want to join?: Lots of my old friends play here and I've been having a great time reconnecting with everyone. It would be a pleasure to be a member of the community.

Referred by:

Additional Details: Initially played during private beta but was still tied up with NTG at the time. Was drawn back by friends playing here and I've been very impressed by all of the new content. It's really awesome seeing so much progress.

Looking at offers on 1 in 2.3 bloodweep of damnation. Looking for around 300k worth (not set in stone.) Will not accept pure, I like things that shoot

EDIT Also looking at offers on flereous

I buy many good vectors, as long as they dont sucky i pay fat $$$, also earthbounds, will pay fattest $$$

Serenity isnt that bad but i feel like it should have better accuracy.

Its a semi automatic and I feel like it should be able to be used at long distances, also this would help with its trait to refill the ammo.

Another thing it could be buffed on is the stability, for being a high firerate semi automatic it should be just lowered a little bit.

Its only really viable for headshots and if the accuracy is going to be really bad then its not really reliable.

Just a slight buff would probably make this actually viable with its trait and the semi automatic side of it.

So, (this is TOTALLY not because I just found a Bouncy gun), but for a long time a lot of chances have been bothering me on guns.

Deagles, Shotguns and Rifles are hard-locked; at 8, 6 and 6 respectively. But...Why? Shouldn't chance be a bit more random?

I've seen HUGES that are 1 in 40, P90s that are 1 in 25, M16's with 1 in 15, etc. Something doesn't feel right.

Why do I have a Mac10 with a 1 in 9 chance, or a Bizon with a 1 in 12, but guns like the aforementioned P90/M16/Deagle have way out of balance chances? M16's are a high-damage, slow firerate gun. Their chances shouldn't be so high.

If anyone has opinions, please, post them below. But I think some changes should be made. Of course, not a UNIVERSAL change. I.E: Doubleshoot should always have a worse chance than, say, a suffix.

Let's do some comparisons.

I have a Galil with 34 bullets. It has a 1 in 12 chance to trigger a proc. Extremely high firerate. On avg., it 33% of the clip should trigger 1x, in the span of a second.
I have a Deagle with 8 bullets. It has a 1 in 8 chance to trigger a proc. Low firerate. On average, 100% of the clip should trigger 1x, but it'll take a few seconds for the firerate.
I have an AUG with 28 bullets. It has a 1 in 11 chance to trigger a proc. Very high firerate. On average, 45% of the clip should trigger 1x, in about a second.
I have a Shotgun with 8 bullets. It has a 1 in 6 chance to trigger a proc. Very slow firerate. On average, 80% of the clip should trigger 1x, but it'll take multiple seconds.
I have an M16 with 20 bullets. It has a 1 in 10 chance to trigger a proc. Average firerate. On average, 50% of the clip should trigger 1x, but it'll take a few seconds.
I have an M1911 with 7 bullets. It has a 1 in 11 chance to trigger on proc. High firerate. On average, 130% of the clip should trigger 1x, taking a few seconds (ignoring reload).


Slow-firerate weapons just seem bummed, but low-clip weapons do, too. The absolute top-tier are things like Bizons, Mac10's and Galils, which are just incredible for triggering suffixes. But, at the lowest end you have Shotguns, Deagles, M16's especially, which just don't really benefit.

An example would be a 1 in 10 corrosion on an m16 would be next to pointless, but a 1 in 10 corrosion in an AUG (which only has 8 more bullets) would be great. I understand that's intended more-or-less, but some things are BUMMED.

HUGES, for example, suffer from incredibly low damage, incredibly high recoil and incredibly poor "Chances". Now, again, I know this is for BALANCE, but that doesn't mean its actually properly balanced. HUGEs just suck in general, and removing their "Triggers lots of suffixes but is a shit gun" really doesn't benefit them.

AUGS/Vectors have some of the best "Base gun" "stats" of anything, followed by a variety, but I feel like things just don't work out well.

Now, I do NOT want to see, like, 1 in 3 doubleshoot shotguns or something stupid, but shotguns could have a 1 in 3 chance for suffixes or something. Here's some proposed chances:

Shotgun: 1 in 3 for DoT suffixes/etc, 1 in 6 for Doubleshoot/etc.
Deagle: 1 in 4 for DoT/1 in 8 for Doubleshoot
M1911: 1 in 5 for DoT/1 in 10 for Doubleshoot

Just as a comparison. Any opinions? I'd like to know what people think. I'm tired of the "suffix" meta being dominated by the high-clip, high-firerate weapons (Except for some, like the P90)

Again, i.e my Heroic Galil has like, 40 bullets and a 1 in 12 chance, a Heroic Bizon has like 45 bullets and a 1 in 12, but a P90 has like 55 bullets and a...1 in 25? Doesn't make sense.

p.s here's a picture of my bouncy, buff chance pls?
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SELFISHNESS BELOW

Spoiler

Steam Name of Offending Player(s):

Steam ID of Offending Player(s): STEAM_0:0:138958339 03:48

Map the event happened on: de_sanic

Date of event: Sept 08th

What Happened?: He killed 4 people in one round, and replied to the reports with things like "ur a bitch". Then he left. I got Garrus on after to ban him, but since its only a week and this guy is 100% a troll and if he ever comes back it'll only be to troll, so I think he should be banned for good.

Witnesses: Omega Garrus, Jake1o, DONGERWEED, Faolan.

Evidence:

Few days ago I traded msevil my omnipotent mac 10 of the phoenix, only to have her not recieve the gun but have it taken from my inventory.
Not really a big deal i thought, not too rare of a gun (just good scroll gun i liked.)
Didnt think much of it, until today I saw jerome drop a omnipotent mp5 of the phoenix and wanted it to replace said gun i lost.
Well, traded jerome and he gave it to me for free, only to find that this gun ALSO disappeared.
Weird, both same tier with phoenix. They just omnipotents so not a big deal on getting them back, but it is concerning to have both of the guns disappear, so hopefully this can lead to finding a reason why they disappaered, and preventing it from happening to others.